"I just don't trust my body anymore."
She didn't say it with anger.
She said it with exhaustion.
Her shoulders slumped. Her eyes filled with tears. She had spent years trying to understand her cycle, years wondering why pregnancy hadn't happened, years questioning every symptom, every delayed period, every emotion.
Then she quietly whispered the words I have heard from countless women over the years.
"I think my body is broken."
My heart broke for her—not because of her fertility struggles, but because of what she believed about herself.
As a Catholic Womanhood Coach and Billings Ovulation Method instructor, women often come to me thinking they need help understanding their fertility.
Sometimes that's true.
But more often than not, what they're really struggling with isn't their fertility.
It's their relationship with their body.
Those are two very different things.
Somewhere Along the Way, We Stopped Trusting Ourselves
I've never met a little girl who hated her body.
Little girls don't stand in front of the mirror criticizing their stomachs.
They don't worry whether their legs are too big or their hips are too wide.
They don't wonder if they're lovable because of the size of their jeans.
They simply run.
Laugh.
Dance.
Play.
They delight in the bodies God gave them.
So what happens?
Somewhere between childhood and adulthood, we begin listening to voices that were never meant to define us.
We compare ourselves to other women.
We see perfectly edited images on social media.
We hear comments about "beach bodies" and "getting your body back" after pregnancy.
We begin believing that our worth is measured by our appearance, our fertility, or our ability to have children.
Without realizing it, we slowly begin distrusting the very bodies God designed with wisdom.
The Story We Tell Ourselves Matters
One of the greatest lessons I've learned through years of coaching women is this:
Our bodies don't usually create our deepest wounds.
Our interpretation of our bodies does.
A woman experiences infertility.
She tells herself,
"My body failed me."
Another woman suffers a miscarriage.
She quietly believes,
"I wasn't enough."
A newly married woman worries her husband won't find her attractive.
A mother looks at the stretch marks left by pregnancy and sees only what she has lost.
A woman entering menopause wonders whether her best years are behind her.
Do you notice the pattern?
The circumstance becomes a statement about her identity.
Instead of saying,
"My hormones are out of balance,"
she says,
"I'm broken."
Instead of saying,
"My body is communicating something,"
she says,
"My body betrayed me."
Those are not the same thing.
One invites curiosity.
The other creates shame.
Your Body Has Been Speaking All Along
One of my favorite moments as a fertility instructor happened with a woman who had only been charting for two weeks.
She came to our coaching session completely discouraged.
"Mama Jane," she said, "I don't think my body's doing anything."
I smiled because I knew exactly where she was in her cycle.
She was in the naturally infertile phase.
Her body wasn't giving fertility signs because it wasn't supposed to.
As I explained what was happening, I watched her entire face change.
"So...nothing's wrong with me?"
"No."
"My body's actually doing what it's supposed to do?"
"Exactly."
Nothing about her body changed that day.
Only her understanding.
Sometimes the greatest healing doesn't happen because our bodies change.
It happens because we finally understand what they've been trying to tell us all along.
The Body Is Not the Enemy
For years I struggled with my own body.
Infertility.
IBS.
Rosacea.
Body image.
Like many women, I wondered what was wrong with me.
Looking back, I realize my body wasn't fighting me.
It was communicating.
Every symptom.
Every cycle.
Every season.
My body was speaking a language no one had ever taught me.
When women begin learning the Billings Ovulation Method, they're often surprised to discover how beautifully ordered their cycles really are.
But even more surprising is what happens in their hearts.
They stop fighting.
They begin listening.
They become curious instead of critical.
Compassionate instead of condemning.
Confident instead of fearful.
That transformation is about so much more than charting.
It's about learning to receive the body God created instead of constantly trying to fix it.
One of the Most Overlooked Acts of Forgiveness
When we hear the word forgiveness, we usually think about forgiving another person.
Rarely do we think about forgiving our own body.
But perhaps that's exactly where some of us need to begin.
Maybe you've been angry because your body didn't conceive.
Maybe you've resented it because it miscarried.
Maybe you've hated what pregnancy changed.
Maybe you've been embarrassed by your weight.
Maybe you've dreaded every monthly cycle.
Maybe you've believed your body has let you down.
Can I gently offer another possibility?
What if your body isn't your enemy?
What if it has been faithfully carrying you through every joy, every sorrow, every illness, every pregnancy, every loss, and every season of womanhood?
Perhaps today is the day to stop fighting it.
A Simple Practice That Can Change Everything
One of the exercises I give my coaching clients is incredibly simple.
After your shower tomorrow morning, don't rush to get dressed.
Instead, slow down.
As you dry your feet, thank them for carrying you.
Thank your legs for allowing you to walk.
Thank your hands for serving your family.
Thank your heart for beating faithfully every moment of your life.
If you've never done this before, it may feel awkward.
You may even cry.
That's okay.
Gratitude has a beautiful way of loosening the knots resentment has tied around our hearts.
Instead of focusing on everything your body cannot do, begin noticing everything it faithfully does every single day.
God Still Calls You Good
The first chapter of Genesis tells us that when God finished creating humanity, He looked upon everything He had made and declared it "very good."
That includes you.
Your body.
Your femininity.
Your fertility.
Every season of womanhood.
Sin distorted the way we see ourselves.
It did not change the way God sees us.
Friend, if you've spent years believing your body is broken, I want you to hear this from someone who has walked with hundreds of women—and who has walked this road herself.
Your body is not the enemy.
It was created by a good God who loves you deeply.
Perhaps today is the day to stop fighting the body He entrusted to you.
Perhaps today is the day to begin trusting both your body...and the God who designed it.