Hey there, dear friends—
Today, I want to speak to the hearts of our men. To the husbands who are in the thick of it with us. To the ones who love us but sometimes feel lost. And to the wives who long to be seen, cherished, and truly supported through every sacred twist and turn of womanhood.
Let’s just start here: being a woman is a sacred journey.
From menstruation to motherhood, from miscarriage to menopause, our bodies and souls go through countless transitions. It’s not just physical—it’s emotional, spiritual, and often deeply vulnerable. And when a woman is loved through those transitions, when her husband stays close and present through it all, it changes everything. It becomes holy ground.
I know that phrase might sound poetic, but I mean it literally. A woman’s journey—every stage of it—is holy ground.
No Going Back
One of the topics we discussed in this episode of
Cycles and Sanctity is the deep-seated temptation to look back and long for what once was. We hear it from both women and men:
“I wish we could go back to how things were when we first got married.” But here’s the truth: wherever you start in your marriage is the youngest you’re ever going to be in it. There is no going back—but there is tremendous beauty in moving forward, hand-in-hand, with grace.
Your wife’s body is going to change. Period. Pregnancy changes her. Postpartum changes her. Even if God doesn’t bless your marriage with children, time and hormones will still do their work. There’s no escaping that reality—and there’s no shame in it, either. Her body is not something to be fixed or compared. It’s something to be honored. You don’t have to understand every hormone fluctuation (bless you if you try!), but you can choose to stay close and love her right where she’s at.
And let me just say it—if you want to see your wife light up, if you want to help her thrive emotionally and spiritually, try this:
💬 “You are beautiful.”
💬 “You’re doing an amazing job.”
💬 “I’m here for you.”
It’s not about grand gestures. It’s about consistent, intentional love.
Vulnerability in Birth and Beyond
There is no moment quite as vulnerable for a woman as childbirth. None. It doesn’t matter whether it’s a planned natural birth or an emergency C-section—everything in her is raw and focused on bringing new life into the world. And when a man chooses to stay present in that moment, to say, “You’ve got this. I love you. I’m here. You’re safe,” it gives her strength she didn’t even know she had.
But let’s not stop there. After birth comes postpartum—a stretch of time that’s equal parts miraculous and maddening. Hormones crash. Bodies ache. Babies cry. Sleep disappears. And that’s where a husband’s quiet strength can shine again. Sometimes, it’s just sitting beside her while she nurses. Sometimes, it’s bringing her a snack or taking the baby for a walk. And sometimes, it’s just letting her cry and holding her close without needing to fix a thing.
Brothers in Christ, let me say this gently but clearly: You are not called to fix her discomfort. You are called to protect her dignity. And that might look like silence, presence, prayer, or patience. But your support will mean more than you can imagine.
The Fear of Being Left
Now let’s talk about one of the deepest fears many women carry—whether they say it aloud or not: What if he leaves?
It’s not always about physically walking out the door. Sometimes the fear is that he’ll leave emotionally. That he’ll check out. That he’ll drown himself in work or screens or distractions because it’s too much. That fear runs deep, especially in seasons when a woman already feels stretched thin, exhausted, and unsure of her worth.
That’s why your presence is so powerful. Just being there—just staying—can speak volumes. And when you pair your presence with kindness and gentle affirmation, your wife’s heart will find safety. And safe women are strong women. They become even more generous, joyful, and willing to give. That’s just how we’re wired.
Unity in Parenting and Prayer
As children come—and they will test every limit you thought you had—it’s so easy to turn on each other. One of the biggest gifts a man can give his wife is the reminder: “We’re in this together.”
Parenting is not meant to be a tug-of-war. It’s a team sport. And when husbands and wives present a united front, the home becomes a fortress of peace and security. Kids feel it. Moms feel it. Dads feel it too.
And when things get tough—and they will—don’t underestimate the power of prayer. If you’re at an impasse, if you can’t agree, if you’re both exhausted and frustrated, try this:
🕊️ “Let’s take this to the Lord.”
It doesn’t have to be fancy. It can be as simple as “Lord, we need Your help.” But inviting God in changes the energy every time. Because marriage is not just the two of you. It’s a covenant. It’s a team of three players: the husband, the wife, and God..
Presence Over Perfection
If there’s one message I want our men to hear, it’s this: You don’t have to do it perfectly. You just have to be present.
Love isn’t measured by the size of your paycheck or your ability to “fix” the problem. Love is measured by your willingness to stay close, to ask how you can help, to pray with her, to affirm her beauty, and to remind her she is never alone.
Now To The Ladies
Ladies—our part in this?
We have to have the courage to speak.
To answer honestly when our husbands ask how they can help. To receive love. To do our own emotional work instead of expecting them to carry it all for us. That’s how we grow, individually and together.
My Favorite Question:
If you’re wondering where to start, here’s my favorite question to ask in marriage:
💬 “How can I support you right now?”
It’s simple. But it opens the door to intimacy, vulnerability, and trust. Try it tonight. You might be surprised what happens.
Journal Prompt:
📝 Where in your marriage have you felt most supported—or most alone—during a difficult season?
📝What would it look like to invite your spouse into that space with grace and honesty?
Dear reader,
if this message touched your heart, if you found yourself nodding along or wiping a tear, I want to personally invite you to join us for our upcoming program:
This program is a sacred space where we dive deep into everything we just touched on—and so much more. You’ll be supported, encouraged, and equipped with tools to navigate marriage, womanhood, faith, and family with peace and purpose.
Whether you’re a husband trying to love your wife better, or a wife longing for deeper connection, this is your invitation.
Let’s walk this sacred journey—together.
With all my love,
Mama Vicki