There are moments in life that mark you forever.
Moments that divide your life into before and after.
For me, one of those moments was the death of my dear friend, Jen DellaCrosse.
It has now been one year since she passed.
And if I’m honest, grief doesn’t follow a timeline. It doesn’t resolve itself neatly. It doesn’t disappear because time has passed.
But what it does do—if you allow it—is invite you deeper.
Deeper into truth.
Deeper into surrender.
Deeper into your relationship with God.
And that is what I want to talk to you about today.
Because if you are carrying grief… sorrow… loss…
I want you to know this:
There is a way to process it.
There is a way to walk through it.
And you are not meant to do it alone.
The Kind of Woman Who Changes Lives
Jen was not just a good woman.
She was a woman who lived for Christ with clarity, conviction, and joy.
She didn’t just believe the Catholic faith—she embodied it.
She was the kind of woman who walked into a room and left people better. Not because she was trying to impress anyone, but because she was deeply rooted in truth.
She lived with intention.
She loved people well.
She chose holiness—even when it was uncomfortable.
And when suffering came—real, physical, life-ending suffering—she did something that most of us struggle to do:
She surrendered.
Grief Is Real—and It’s Not Something to Avoid
Let me be very clear:
Grief is not something to bypass with spiritual language.
It is not something to numb.
It is not something to rush through.
When Jen got sick, when we saw her decline, when we sat in that reality…
There were tears.
There was confusion.
There was that deep question many of us are afraid to say out loud:
“Lord… how is this good?”
Because from a human perspective, it didn’t make sense.
A wife.
A mother of seven.
A faithful Catholic woman.
And yet—she suffered.
This is where many women get stuck.
They feel grief… but they don’t know what to do with it.
So they suppress it.
Distract themselves.
Stay busy.
Push through.
But grief doesn’t disappear.
It gets stored.
What Most Women Don’t Realize About Grief
Here is the truth:
Grief is not just an emotion—it is an experience that needs to be processed.
If you don’t process it, it will show up in other ways:
And many Catholic women feel guilt on top of it.
“I should have more faith.”
“I should be stronger.”
“I shouldn’t feel this way.”
But that is not how God designed you.
God gave you emotions for a reason.
And grief, when processed properly, becomes a pathway to deeper union with Him.
What Jen Taught Me About Sorrow
One of the most powerful things I witnessed in Jen’s life was this:
She didn’t pretend suffering wasn’t happening.
She entered into it—with Christ.
She lived what so many of us say we believe:
That suffering can be redemptive.
She continued to love.
She continued to serve.
She continued to live fully—even while dying.
She traveled.
She created memories with her children.
She chose presence over fear.
She showed us that grief and joy can coexist.
And that changed me.
The Missing Piece: How to Process Grief
This is where I want to be very direct with you.
Because this is the work I do with my clients.
Most women:
Feel grief
Think about their grief
Pray about their grief
But they do not process their grief.
And there is a difference.
Here is the method I teach:
1. Identify the Thought Behind the Pain
Grief is not just sadness.
It is often tied to thoughts like:
These thoughts create the emotional intensity.
You must name them.
2. Allow the Emotion—Without Judgment
Instead of resisting the sorrow, allow it.
Sit with it.
Feel it in your body.
Do not label it as wrong or weak.
Even Christ wept.
3. Bring It Into Prayer—Honestly
Not polished. Not filtered.
Real.
“Lord, I don’t understand this.”
“Lord, this hurts.”
“Lord, I feel lost.”
This is where relationship happens.
4. Re-anchor in Truth
This is critical.
Because without truth, grief turns into despair.
Truth sounds like:
5. Choose Your Next Step Forward
Not the whole future.
Just the next step.
This is how healing happens.
The Power of Surrender
Jen’s life pointed us to one thing over and over again:
Surrender.
“Jesus, I surrender myself to You. Take care of everything.”
That is not passive.
That is active trust.
And let me tell you something:
Surrender becomes real when life is out of your control.
When the diagnosis comes.
When the loss happens.
When the future is uncertain.
That is when you find out what you truly believe.
What the Catholic Faith Offers in Grief
This is why our faith matters so much.
Because we do not grieve like the world.
We grieve with hope.
We believe:
And that changes everything.
It doesn’t remove the pain.
But it gives it meaning.
If You Are Grieving Right Now
I want to speak directly to you.
If you have lost someone…
If you are carrying sorrow…
If you feel stuck in your emotions…
You are not broken.
You are human.
But you also don’t have to stay there.
Because here’s the truth:
Grief is not meant to trap you.
It is meant to transform you.
And you need tools to walk through it.
This Is Where I Help Women
This is exactly why I do what I do.
I help Catholic women:
Not in a vague way.
In a structured, practical, faithful way.
Because healing doesn’t happen by accident.
It happens through intentional work.
A Final Word About Jen
If Jen were here right now, she wouldn’t want us stuck in sorrow.
She would want us living.
She would want us trusting.
She would want us surrendering.
She would remind us:
God’s plan is bigger than ours.
And she would probably say:
“Hey buddy… pull yourself together. Trust the Lord.”
And honestly?
She’d be right.
Your Next Step
If this blog stirred something in you…
If you recognize yourself in this…
If you are carrying grief and don’t know how to process it…
I want to invite you to take the next step.
Let’s walk through this together.
Because you don’t have to figure this out alone.
And you don’t have to stay stuck.
You are not alone.
God is with you.
And healing is possible.