As we close out the month of May, a time traditionally dedicated to honoring the Blessed Virgin Mary, I want to take a deeper look at one of her lesser-known yet profoundly powerful titles: Mary, Mother of Sorrows. This devotion may not be as familiar to some, but it reveals an incredible hidden strength—a strength that many of us Catholic women need as we carry our own crosses through life.
In this episode of
Cycles and Sanctity, Mama Vicki and I share not just the beauty of this devotion, but how it resonates deeply with the real sorrows women face—infertility, loss, loneliness, and the burdens of motherhood. Through the lens of the Seven Sorrows of Mary, we are invited to meditate not just on Mary’s grief, but on the redemptive power of suffering itself.
Why Mary, Mother of Sorrows?
There is a reason the Church holds up Mary as a model for us—not because She is a distant queen far removed from our pain, but because She knows sorrow intimately. From the moment She said “yes” to God, Mary entered a life marked by suffering. Yet she never backed down. She never turned away. And She never gave up hope.
Mary, Our Role Model, Not Our Goddess
Catholics are sometimes misunderstood when it comes to Mary. People might think we “worship” her—but we don’t. We honor her because God chose her. And we seek Her intercession because no one is more in tune with God’s Will than She is. During the lowest point of my struggle with infertility, I was praying my rosary and crying out to Mary in prayer—and in the stillness of that suffering, Mary whispered to me: “I cannot give you a baby right now.” That moment, though heartbreaking, brought peace. I understood that what I was asking for in that moment was outside of God's Holy Will. I had a deep knowledge of how powerful Our Mother's intercession is. As I meditated on that prayer experience, God brought an image to me. When my husband was gone in the military, there were many nights my young daughter would cry for Daddy, and there was nothing I could do to bring him to her. This was what I understood Mary was telling me. I was asking for Her intercession for something that was not possible at that moment. I also took comfort in the fact She told me "right now." I didn't know when. I was being called to trust and be patient. I didn't know exactly what that motherhood would look like. It was the first time I truly surrendered to God.
Mary always points us back to Jesus, and Her intercession will never fall outside of God's perfect will.
The Seven Sorrows: A Meditation on Mary's Grief
The devotion of the Seven Sorrows invites us into Mary’s deepest pains—moments that cut to the heart of every woman. It’s not a rosary; it’s a chaplet, and each sorrow offers a meditation that helps us reflect on our own pain, loss, and longing through the eyes of Our Lady.
Here is a brief reflection on each of the Seven Sorrows:
1. The Prophecy of Simeon
This joyful moment—Jesus’ presentation in the temple—is suddenly pierced by Simeon’s words: “And a sword will pierce your heart.” What mother hasn’t held their child while also fearing for their future? Mary knew that joy and sorrow are often intertwined. And yet, there's hope: "so that the thoughts of many hearts may be revealed." (Luke 2:35) Mary accepts this sword in Her heart for us. Bring your thoughts to Her!
2. The Flight into Egypt
Imagine fleeing in the night, hearing the wails of mothers whose children were murdered. Mary’s sorrow was not just personal—it was deeply connected to the pain of others. This sorrow invites us to hold space for the grief of all mothers. Mary carried these mothers' sorrow into Egypt. And She will carry your sorrow, if you come to Her.
3. The Loss of the Child Jesus in the Temple
Have you ever lost sight of your child in a store or feared for a child drifting away emotionally or spiritually? Mary’s three-day search reminds us that separation, confusion, and even fear are part of the motherhood journey. She and St. Joseph were entrusted to care for the Messiah. Many times parenthood can feel daunting and we can question our own abilities. Take these concerns to Mary. She understands.
4. Mary Meets Jesus on the Way to Calvary
That haunting moment in The Passion of the Christ, where Jesus falls and Mary runs to him—only for Him to say, “Look, Mother, I make all things new.” Every mom has watched her child suffer and felt powerless to fix it. This sorrow reminds us that even when we can't take the pain away, we can be present. Mary doesn't run away or try to change God's Holy Will. She walks with Jesus in His Passion, understanding this is Redemptive Suffering.
5. The Crucifixion and Death of Jesus
There are no words for this. Watching your child die unjustly—slowly and publicly—is beyond comprehension. Mary stayed. She didn’t flinch. She didn’t turn away. She gave us a model of courage and unwavering faith. I have known many women whose children die before they do. It is a terrible tragedy. The pain is overwhelming not matte the age of your child. Mary understands like no other mother can.
6. The Body of Jesus is Taken Down from the Cross
The image of the Pietà—Mary cradling her broken Son—is burned into Catholic imagination. This sorrow speaks to anyone who has held a loved one in death, who has wished to turn back time, or who has simply wept without words. This statue explains why we have holy art within our churches. Simply standing before this statue for 5 minutes before or after Mass and ask Mary to be with you in your suffering.
7. The Burial of Jesus
This was the first time since the Incarnation that Mary was physically, emotionally and spiritually separated from Her Son. While the three days in Jerusalem had Jesus lost from her, this was final. And yet she trusted. She didn’t know what Resurrection would look like—but she believed.
Why Meditate on Sorrow?
Our culture tells us to avoid suffering at all costs. But the Catholic Faith teaches us something different: Suffering can be redemptive. It can sanctify. It can transform. We are all in "vale of tears". Suffering and sorrow is the one thing we can all share as humans.
Mary shows us that there is another side to sorrow. She reminds us that pain does not get the final word. As Mama Vicki said, “You don’t get over grief, but you can get through it—and sometimes, that ‘through’ leads to blessings you never expected.”
When we meditate on Mary’s sorrows, we don’t compare our pain to Hers—we join our pain to Hers. In doing so, we discover we are not alone. Mary walks with us. She understands our motherhood. She understands our loss. She understands our exhaustion.
Mary’s Power Over Darkness
Did you know that exorcists like Father Chad Ripperger invoke Mary, Mother of Sorrows, during exorcisms? Why? Because her obedience, humility, and willingness to suffer alongside Christ make her a powerful intercessor against evil.
She humbles the enemy—not through loud words or force, but through quiet submission to God’s will. That’s a lesson many of us need. When life spins out of control, when grief threatens to swallow us, Mary teaches us to remain steady, trusting that God is at work even in our darkest hours.
How to Start This Devotion
If you’ve never prayed the Seven Sorrows Chaplet, you can start today. Don’t worry if it feels overwhelming. Start with one sorrow. Give yourself five minutes. Let Mary’s heart speak to yours.
You can find the full chaplet on apps like Laudate, or search for an audio version on YouTube or Spotify. Light a candle. Grab your journal. Let the tears come if they must. Let the silence speak.
Why Catholic Coaching Helps
As a Catholic mindset coach, I've seen the powerful intersection between prayer and personal growth. Sometimes sorrow overwhelms not because of the event itself—but because we don’t know how to process the emotions it brings.
Coaching helps you name the thoughts and feelings you’ve buried. It gives you tools to respond, not just react. It helps you ask: Is this thought 100% true? What would God say about it?
The more you practice awareness and emotional regulation, the more peace you find. Coaching doesn’t replace prayer—it deepens it.
In Closing: You Are Not Alone
Mary, Mother of Sorrows, shows us that strength and sorrow are not opposites. They coexist. She stayed. She trusted. And so can you.
Your sorrow has meaning. Your pain is seen. Your suffering is not wasted.
So let us pray: Mary, Mother of Sorrows, be with us in our heartbreak. Help us walk with faith, like you did, even when the road is steep. Lead us to your Son. Help us carry our crosses—and remind us that Resurrection is always coming. Amen.
Have you ever prayed the Chaplet of the Seven Sorrows? We’d love to hear about your experience. Share your thoughts below.